When a VA loan deal is about to fall apart, no rate calculator tells you what to do next.
After 26 years in mortgage lending, I can tell you that deals rarely fail because of paperwork or pricing. Deals often change course when someone reaches an emotional limit before the finish line. A seller may lose patience, a buyer may feel uncertain, or an agent may take a firm position.
You won’t find an app or website that can handle that. What helps is experience, judgment, and the willingness to pick up the phone when things get challenging.
Tevis Durbin (NMLS #424899) is a Producing Branch Manager at Supreme Lending with over 26 years of experience in the mortgage industry. Leading “The Durbin Team,” Tevis combines his deep financial background, holding an MBA in Finance and a degree in Economics, with specialized loan programs to help Midwest homebuyers navigate complex markets. He is a Certified Mortgage Advisor, serves on the State Board for the Mortgage Bankers of Indiana, and acts as the Communication Chair for the Hamilton County division of MIBOR.
The VA Loan Deal That Came Down to 48 Hours
A VA loan deal can quickly become complicated when two closings are linked. A veteran client came to us in a situation most buyers do not encounter. He was selling his home in Florida while simultaneously closing on a purchase in Indiana.
His kids needed to start school. He had already driven up, enrolled them, and moved his family into a hotel while the Florida sale was still in progress.
Our team was ready. The client’s VA entitlement was transferring from the Florida property to the Indiana property. The file was clean, and we had everything mapped out. We were waiting on one thing: the Florida closing.
Then the Indiana seller became concerned about timing. He had already seen one buyer step away after a month. Now his property had been tied up twice, and he was considering putting it back on the market.
Our buyer had already relocated his family based on the expected timeline.
This is the moment when mortgage lending becomes something closer to mediation. A rate sheet does not help here. Twenty-six years of navigating transactions where real people carry real stakes does.
De-Escalation in Action and the Move That Saved This Deal
The most valuable thing you can offer in a moment like this is not an immediate solution. Instead, everyone needs a pause.
People need to be heard before they can think clearly. That is not soft advice. It is a practical, deal-saving strategy.
I called the listing agent and the seller directly. The goal was not to argue. It was to slow the moment down and help everyone move toward a clear decision.
“Are we making a rational decision? Even if you put it back on the market, how quickly can you find another buyer? The first buyer wasted a month and then walked away. We had to give them a chance to vent, let them get it out of their system, and say don’t kill our deal. Give us a first right. Let us prove to you we’re at the goal line. They took a deep breath, and 48 hours later, we were done.” – Tevis Durbin, Producing Branch Manager (NMLS #424899)
The Florida sale closed, making the funds available for the Indiana purchase. The family got out of the hotel.
The Lesson This Story Holds for Your Transaction
If you are heading into a purchase, this illustrates something no calculator will show you.
The right lender is not just running numbers. They are helping guide a transaction that involves multiple parties, timelines, and expectations.
For VA borrowers, transactions involving entitlement transfers or simultaneous buy-sell situations carry additional moving parts. Having a lender who can explain timing clearly and communicate confidently with all parties can make a meaningful difference.
Clients in complex situations often say what helped most was knowing someone understood the full picture, not just their file, but the entire transaction.
If your transaction looks similar, start the conversation with The Durbin Team before you write the offer. Understanding your financing early helps create a smoother path later.
The Skill Set No Lender Advertises
Mortgage lenders advertise rates. They advertise speed to close. Some advertise their technology stack or their app.
Nobody advertises the ability to de-escalate a deal on the verge of collapse. But knowing when to let someone vent or how to reframe an emotional moment is often the difference between a closed loan and a dead one.
The team I work with has stayed together for six to eight years. Our 97.75% five-star client rating didn’t come from having the lowest rate on a given Tuesday. It came from showing up when the transaction got hard and knowing what to do next.
This pattern holds across loan types. Whether we’re working on a conventional purchase, a VA transaction, or another loan program, human dynamics are often the deciding factor. Process and paperwork matter. So does the person managing them.
“Sometimes our job is really therapeutic, more than anything. You’re playing a therapist, letting people vent, and then just trying to help them find a way to make a rational decision.” – Tevis Durbin, Producing Branch Manager (NMLS #424899)
Every Deal Has a Human on Both Sides
The seller who nearly stepped away was not acting without reason. He had already experienced a delayed transaction and wanted clarity moving forward. Once he understood the full situation and timeline, and had the opportunity to express his concerns, he chose to move forward.
That is what experience provides. Not just knowledge of loan products or rates, but the ability to understand situations, communicate clearly, and help everyone move toward a resolution.
When evaluating lenders, an important question to consider is not just the rate. It is how they handle unexpected situations and guide a transaction when timing or communication becomes important.
FAQs About VA Loan Transactions
What is a VA entitlement transfer, and how does it affect a VA loan deal timeline?
A VA entitlement transfer moves your loan benefit from a property you’re selling to one you’re buying. Unlike starting fresh with a new VA loan, this process requires the first sale to close before the second purchase can be funded. That dependency creates a linked timeline that both buyer and seller need to understand clearly from the start.
Can a seller back out if a closing takes longer than expected?
A seller can back out if the agreed purchase contract terms allow it, which is why purchase agreement language and extension clauses matter. If a seller threatens to relist, the first step is reviewing whether they have contractual grounds to do so. Beyond that, the lender can reach out to explain the situation and demonstrate real progress to the seller. That often makes the difference between a seller choosing to wait and a deal collapsing.
How do I protect myself as a buyer in a complicated transaction?
Work with a lender who manages communication proactively, not reactively. You want someone who contacts listing agents early, explains complex loan structures in plain terms, and has the credibility to hold a deal together when timelines shift. Preparation before the contract is signed is always better than problem-solving after.
Why are VA loans sometimes harder to close on time?
VA loans involve a federal guarantee process and specific appraisal requirements aligned with Fannie Mae and VA property standards. In some cases, they have entitlement considerations that add steps not present in typical transactions. Experienced VA lenders plan for these steps in advance and communicate them to all parties.
What happens if the seller relists while I’m under contract?
If you’re still within your contractual protection window, relisting does not automatically end your deal. The more important step is to reach out immediately through your agent and lender to address the seller’s concern directly. In most cases, sellers who threaten to relist want reassurance that the transaction will close, not an exit. Giving them that reassurance quickly, with real evidence of progress, usually resolves the situation.
Is emotional negotiation really part of a lender’s job?
More than most people expect. A mortgage lender manages multiple parties across a transaction. That includes the buyer, seller, agents, title companies, and sometimes multiple lenders if a linked sale is involved. When frustration peaks, the lender who can de-escalate and redirect a conversation is often the reason a deal closes. It’s not in any job description, but it shows up in every difficult file.
How do I know if my lender can handle a complicated transaction?
Ask them directly: tell me about a deal that nearly fell apart and what you did to save it. Listen for specifics, not platitudes about service or experience. A lender who has handled complex situations will describe the problem clearly, explain their actions concretely, and know how the story ends. Vague answers are a useful signal.
What makes a team’s long tenure matter to a borrower?
When the same processors and underwriters handle files year after year, they develop deep fluency with edge cases, loan product nuances, and communication rhythms. This fluency can speed up even complicated closings. A team with high turnover relearns those lessons with every new hire. Consistency in the back office is something borrowers rarely see, but always feel when a transaction gets complicated.
When the Numbers Stop, Experience Takes Over
An experienced lender shows their value when a deal starts to lose traction. These are the moments when a family lives out of a hotel, and a seller starts to lose patience. Someone needs to step in, reset the conversation, and guide the deal forward.
That’s not a scenario you prepare for with a spreadsheet. You prepare for it with 26 years of transactions, a team that knows the work, and the judgment to know when to push and when to listen.
If you’re heading into a purchase, straightforward or otherwise, bring us in early. The more we understand your situation before the contract is signed, the better positioned we are to protect you when it counts.
Let’s make a plan. Connect with The Durbin Team at Supreme Lending and tell us what you’re working with.